Memory Boxes, Mezze & Keep It Bush Craft
Show broadcast on 13 February 2016
Elis stood John up to empty his memory box including two bagged beards while John got sentimental over old pay slips begging the question: what strange paraphernalia have you kept over the years? Elis discusses the cool 'vibes' of Hackney and John puts his Traffic Cops knowledge to use by advising listeners to not drink and babysit. Plus Tick Off A Taste, Winner Plays On, Humble Brag Of The Week, Elis' Gig Diaries, and Email Of The Species.
Camarthen listener wants his friend to be more like himself and to stop imitating Elis. Fan from Mississippi brings on Elis' southern state impression and acceptability comparisons between Thornbury and the US. Listener educates us all on the winking method of reaching the bathroom in the night.
John's introduction of Elis
"To my left is a man described by one Llanbradach County Councillor as the only hope we've got."
Conversations and riffs
Elis' memory box.
What's the legal alcohol limit for handling a baby?
Radio X - the voice of bushcraft.
John's agent's booking dexterity.
Storage of old beards.
Belly button scabs.
Perfume shop competition.
Listeners text and tweet during the show on this week's topic.
Following on from 'bagged beards' what are the odd things that you've kept? Listener kept a cigarette butt from Liam Gallagher. Kept a 3D pair of glasses from an ex - they might come in handy! My brother kept a fart in a jar to "see what happens!"
Elis' Gig Diaries
Elis reads aloud from diaries he kept during his early stand-up days.
Catacomb, sterile, banquet, vagabond, grocer - remember these as these are funny words (what about 'pipe'?). Elis won't forget the look on the audience's faces as he kept saying the word 'vagabond' repeatedly. He saves the set by doing his default northerner impression.
He rebukes himself that he is better than doing jokes about alloy wheels. Some great ad libbing tonight including some stuff about fallopian tubes.
A Robins Amongst the Pigeons
John reads aloud from his autobiography.
From anonymous - listener discusses email with client and discovers a fellow PCD ""you have got to be on email these days.""
Shout out to Dark Star brewery that sent John a taster set.
More examples of that scourge of social media, the humblebrag.
(Facebook) "When your psychologist asks if she can quote one of your blog posts in the book she's currently writing about narcissism, and tells you she gives a printout of your blog posts to other clients that come to her for help about their bad love as *quote* you write what people feel #thestudenthasbecometheteacher"
Winner Plays On
Elis and John face off in the weekly quiz on topics of their choice.
Chaucer (John) v St David (Elis). Coin toss is Tails for Wales (Elis). John answers first and scores a half point! Elis scores 3. Elis wins 3-1.
Tick Off a Taste
The gang try a new taste sensation sent in by a listener.
John discovers he ingested beef fat during last week's twinkie escapade.
Elis ticks off a caper berry. It takes like ponds in an urban area that has not been looked after.
The boys try breakfast cereal Curiously Cinnamon. It tastes like fireworks night, it's a tongue-tingly different way to start my day. Elis has a cinnamon pond party in his mouth.
The 'Keep It Session' Sessions
A special section at the end of the podcast for music recommendations.
Starting with the correct pronunciation of "Myfanwy". Syd Matters is John's choice brought to John's attention by his friend Robin who make him a yearly playlist called the Bumhole Gazette! John's favourite track is called Lost although he goes for High Life today.