Episode 245
Victorian Twaddle, Spooky Juice & You're Sacked
Show broadcast on 17 November 2018
It only every takes a couple of 'madness tweaks' to get an Elis & John podcast up and running. This week the lads discuss what to do when your Mother / Mother-in-law sees you naked, John's on and off relationship with the law, Elis' hair and a certain internet-based game show on a digital TV channel. All this plus the Humblebrags, a tangy taste and a game about temperature!
Podcast intro
The difference between a Cork and a Dublin Irish accent (concerning Elis in sitcom 'Josh').
A listener has unopened cans of Pepsi and Sunkist from the '90s, which he's dubbed "Britpop Sunkist".
John's introduction of Elis
"To my left, the 50th Welshman to set foot on continental Europe. The trip, made in July 2012, was part-funded by the Welsh Assembly to celebrate 25 years of Welsh travel. Since Bryn Davies' first landmark trip to Euro Disney in 1993, over a hundred Welsh people have ventured beyond the British Isles. The trip included a portion of mussels and frites in Normandy and the purchase of 200 stubbies in Calais for a barbecue to celebrate his safe return. "
Conversations and riffs
John's new quiz show 'Beat the Internet' debuted on digital TV channel Dave this week but of course Elis hasn't watched it yet. John asks Elis how he copes with having to relinquish creative control on some projects. Elis: "I cope by remembering that before I did comedy I was a temp doing data entry." John: "But before I did comedy, I was a potential Poet Laureate."
John and Producer Joe compare haircut prices but Elis, man of the people, won't divulge how much his Toni & Guy haircut costs.
John threatens to sack Elis on air (can he do that?) for challenging John's moral compass.
John has come up with a new piece of advice for Elis after he lost and found his suitcase: "Regret, review, improve, die."
Elis James' Light-Hearted Paper Review
Elis' selection of humorous stories from this week's newspapers.
Danny DeVito likes electric cars. A clash over farts during darts. Jeremy Clarkson is not sure about the new proposed speed limit restriction on London's roads: how will it affect lorries delivering "organic peace fruit" to shops, and will it apply to cyclists and pro-cycling Jeremy Vine's "Victorian Twaddle"?
John's Shame Well
John frees another listener of their shame.
Your mother-in-law sees you naked, chasing her dog down the hallway.
Humblebrag
More examples of that scourge of social media, the humblebrag.
When you're song is playing in yet another bar.
Welsh Word of the Week
Elis picks out a curious Welsh word.
A listener has sent in a Welsh phrase sheet found in a Welsh language learning book that includes lots of swearing.
'Sebonu' - literally, 'I'm soaping you up', used to mean 'I'm buttering you up', 'I'm charming you'.
Made-Up Games
Listeners suggest made-up games that Elis and John can play.
The Temperature Game: Using an agreed newspaper weather section or weather website as source, players guess either the forecast daily high or the current temperature (depending in how the game is being played) in various world cities. Points are awarded per degree away from the actual temperature, with the lowest points tally at the end of the game winning.
Tick Off a Taste
The gang try a new taste sensation sent in by a listener.
Ghoulish Texan spicy sweets in a "spooky juice".
The 'Keep It Session' Sessions
A special section at the end of the podcast for music recommendations.
Roots Manuva (Elis)