Episode 182
Not the Lovely Pippa, Fiery Bin & John FM
Show broadcast on 12 August 2017
We all visit the toilet mate. Robins was down the line from Edinburgh once again and perched coquettishly under his duvet whilst Elis kept a firm grip on the studio tiller, it was an absolute corker of a show. There's plenty of shame: It's the name of the game don't cha know? Elis thoroughly updated John with the Paper Review and there was a big surprise too! Good news if you like fruitcake.
John's introduction of Elis
"Elis' intro of John: To my north, we have the only comedian to be refused work experience at the Crown Prosecution Service because he was so law-abiding it was regarded as too creepy.
John is still in Edinburgh and joins via FaceTime. "
Conversations and riffs
John has a new technique for getting to sleep: he imagines he has been bequeathed a large amount of money and has to decide how he would split it between ISAs.
An update to the download stats: it's not 5m downloads as reported a few weeks ago, it's 12.6m
After 25 years, Elis has decided to get a website.
Elis James' Light-Hearted Paper Review
Elis' selection of humorous stories from this week's newspapers.
A boffin has been working on an emoji translator. Why champagne is great. Old explorers' fruit cake that is still edible.
John's Shame Well
John frees another listener of their shame.
Needing to do a smelly 'big toilet' in the only staff toilet in a Virgin Megastore and accidentally pulling the disabled alarm cord, drawing all your staff colleagues' attention to your smelly toilet experience, including the girl you fancy.
Humblebrag
More examples of that scourge of social media, the humblebrag.
You're just trying to run your construction business on LinkedIn but are inundated by offers of dates from beautiful and glamorous women.
Made-Up Games
Listeners suggest made-up games that Elis and John can play.
The Slang Game: Someone chooses a thing, like 'money', and you alternately have to come up with slang terms for it, like 'dosh' or 'Trevors' (of course) until someone can't come up with a valid one.
The 'Keep It Session' Sessions
A special section at the end of the podcast for music recommendations.
Richard James (ex-bassist of Gorky's Zygotic Mynci) (Elis)